November 1938 to early 1940, part 5

He [Chargo/Chago] looks stupidly at the Paris Soir [newspaper] and says France & Germany can never have permanent peace as Germany is Dictatorship and France Democracy – We talk of the Strike at Le Havre and look at pictures of Marines taking an [illegible] of the ship “Paris”[1] – I read Candide to Chargo and he looks sleepy – A knock at the door and Xtian [sic: Christian Poulsen] arrives with a Swedish girl friend of his – It is exciting she is the first girl to get into my room and Xtian me to go with them and have coffee – I agree, get up & dress up – Chargo is embarrassingly excited – I say I shall meet him afterwards but he insists on coming [illegible] like a child –

[/P] We go cafe (         ) opposite Le Latin – The lights are wonderful at night – the revolving lights especially advertising the picture of the [illegible] line of defense [sic: defence] at the Rhine – Describing the cafe – The young girl is very attractive [,] her teeth are uneven and when she smiles she is very beautiful

Chargo talks about his travels and tells them how shy I am to eat at the hotel [insertion in margin: He tells them I sing etc etc .] He laughs at odd times [,] I am embarrassed but the girl is interested [.] I talked little but I enjoy sitting on the Boulevard & watching the crowd – She tells me she is a student at Sorbonne – She asks me to go with her one evening to dance at Montmartre [.] I agree with his givings – [insertion in margin: We take beers and a coffee for young girl] I am quite attracted but I feel it is merely an infatuation soon to pass – I hope so for love affairs exhaust me – and it is a job to amuse a young woman –

We leave & go to listen to gramophone records at --- . Chargo departs & I am glad [.] She says she likes Chargo for he is kind [.] I say he is too kind & sweet – I feel I am getting tired of Chargo – I listen to Beethoven 8^th symphony 1^st movement – We take the young person home 12 ocl [sic: o’clock]. I am sorry to part with her – we go to cake shop and buy cakes from the vendor in to the mouth & march down St Michel eating – I break into laugh and tell Xtian [sic: Christian Poulsen] how unheard a thing like that in London – or South Africa [.] How miserable I was carrying ice cream for a young lady once in SA. She insisted on buying some and eating as we walked in the street [.] I could have collapsed – He says it is the same in Denmark – Paris was different [,] nobody bothers about any other person’s affairs – we go towards his hotel and he tells me [illegible] how free he is in Paris [.] (It reminds me of Grahamstown [in South Africa] and the fellows from Transkei)  Pamla etc etc and go to sleep and think of the young person all the night [.] damn rotten –

// At school usual things [,] afterwards I meet Alexandre and talk.  Dinner and I go to Xtian’s Hotel [.] He wants to make pictures of the Bible – So I give him one – He is talkative [,] we talk about the [illegible] and how [illegible] – Pulzer says the French want another revolution to wipe up the muck of this system – and that we have not long to wait for one [.] He speaks of corruption of France & of 200 hundred families – No Liberty, No Equality No Fraternity – He hates Deladier [Edouard Deladier was Minister of Defence of France, 1936 to 1940] & I believe Blum [André Léon Blum, French socialist politician] cd [sic: could] have done something – Xtian is not interested [,] he thinks the French Revolution & blood were hideous & unjustified [,] but then I feel he is confused because he had sympathised with the workers on Nov 30[2]. 

[/P] He rises and goes & I go to Putzers room & continue talking – He has been to a nightclub & met some Scottish Highlanders seeing Paris – It struck me as odd even to think of a Scotchman in Paris to say nothing of a night club – He says they don’t like the English – He tells me of his young lady in America & how he wd [sic: would] have liked to marry her but he has not enough to keep himself alive – It is a tragedy he says [.] I say it looks as if prostitution has every justification for existence as things are [,] it is horrible and brutal but sex must be recognised and catered for as such to the degradation of man – He shaves & dresses to go out to meet a girl friend – Xtian [sic: Christian Poulsen] is restless also dresses & goes to do shopping       for a tea party – He expects visitors and asks me to wait & show them in while he is away – I wait but he returns before them with a parcel of eatables – He is very kindhearted & likes to entertain – I go to my hotel and shave & get ready for Hearn’s – I go down to supper –

[/P] After I walk to Montparnasse [.] I take the lift and arrive on the 7^th floor Mme Hearn’s [.] I was ushered in by the lame fellow – And presently she appears and all beaming hospitality etc etc – dressed in the most unconventional manner – biggish & middle-aged [,] a perpetual cigarette – Shows me pictures of the lame man – very like Putzer’s in some ways based on the cast and fantastic – Shock of black hair concentrated on the forehead – The apartments are delightful – I stay in the foreroom and the bell rings a bell rings and the couple walks in [.] A wife & husband and they speak English – woman has agreeable face [,] the man [,] no – He seems to be on the point of breaking into tears – He sit [sic: sits] down and talk about Johannesburg & Durban [,] the womans sister staying in Johannesburg [“] I asked her to go there as living is so comfortable and cheap – Her brother has business there & doing well [“] – I am not happy discussing South Africa – They tell of thunderstorms & earth tremors in Joburg [sic: Johannesburg]. He cannot imagine what Johannesburg is like – wonders if have photographers etc.  The women gossip & we three now talk a little politics [.]

[/P] The man is a writer of short stories & novels – He has stayed in Egypt.  He asks what the Natives would feel like with Hitler as a coloniser – I tell him that the Africans are tired of England and that the English have bungled things in South Africa – He agrees things are bad but they would be worse with German colonisation – The Germans race purity etc – The English have done well for [crossed out: India] Egypt & I tell him I don’t like the English in South Africa at any rate [.] Then he speaks of the haughty and overbearing attitude of the English man in the colonies – as compared with the sincerity of the French Equality feeling Blacks officers in the Army in Paris with white wives and nobody takes any notice – He also admits that in the event of a war the English colonies would take the opportunity to revolt against England with the assistance of Japan & India especially – He tells me he does not believe there will be a war and that Munich was a bluff – Russia, France & England & America too strong for the dictatorships – any way the Italians wd [sic: would] revolt against a war [,] America wd [sic: would] come within two weeks [,] does not wish to see a powerful Japan [.]

[/P] The lame fellow fusses around and speaks broken English [,] he seems unhappy [.] Mme [French: Madam] has too domineering a personality [.] She does a bit too much ordering about.

We have tea and cake in glass cups [,] they are strangely light – I thank goodness I manage to lift one without spilling tea – I prefer tea and rum in a long bottle

We talk on and there is a common friend they discuss who was a great fortune but lost all the money no one seems to know how – But man explains : expensive clothes, and Russian temperament to throw away money – lived in London & sought things shirtmaker-tailor in Bond Street [reference: Bond Street, London, renowned for many skilled and expensive men’s tailors] –

Huge cat frightens the little woman [.] She says she fears cats – the sleekness – But this is no ordinary cat [,] its uncanny – I too have a vague fear – The lame one takes it away – The writer speaks of Surrealism, English Breton & novel [presumed to be André Breton, who was a French poet and writer] – [illegible] is finished and [illegible] new young writers coming to the fore – He has just written a new novel and cannot make the corrections ([illegible]) – 

We see photographs and magazines where Hearn has sent photographs [.] “Paris” has very suggestive poses and obscene [.] It is all boring & unexciting – I like the photos of street with workmen [.]  The young girls have interesting faces [.] Mme has mastered technique but I feel the choice subject matter is dead and haphazard –

Mme [French: Madame Hearn] does not like to live in London prefers Paris – I too prefer Paris [,] more healthy space for the arts.

Little woman says her sister wants her to go to Johannesburg [,] life so easy there (Yes cheap black labour but not for long!) I say Johannesburg is nothing but a huge mining camp with no culture – 

Mme hopes some one shoots Rippendorp [sic: Joachim von Ribbentrop, French Minister of Defence] and sorry no body blew up the train when all Nazi chiefs went to Italy – [insert in margin but illegible] Little woman fears war [,] had experience in Brussels [.] Madame plays with cat and lets it take cigarette from her mouth. Also makes it leap to her arm after much coaxing - & snapping of fingers [.] We go – 

[/P] Muns is sorry he was not clever tonight [insert from margin: I is an English way but poor in France] following sorry Xtian [sic: Christian Poulsen] asks what it was like [.] I tell him good – promise to take him to the house one day – Paul is interested [illegible] the Egyptian works away and cuts & tears the clay like mad – I work better now with clay – I tell Paul about South Africa and the Zulus – He is interested & evidently fear reading about SA for he speaks about the Boers as being the most wicked of the white group but I correct him & say the whole lot of whites in Africa [,] English included [,] are wicked – He is dismayed –

We go out and see notice for all students to demonstrate against Italy’s pretensions towards Tunis [sic: Tunisia] & Corse [sic: Corsica] [.] Paul is excited and runs to Place de la Sorbonne – We meet Putzer and He tells us about demonstration of students [.] Hear [illegible] Putzer says they say “Paris for the French” but really it is “Venise à la France” & “Avant Daladier” [.] We see a huge crowd & among them some fellows from the Art School [,] they sing The Marseillaise [National anthem of France] - & shouts – The police have come out in great numbers – no incidents –

Afternoon I go to Xtian & we go to Grand Chaumiere – Xtian says I am a damn fool for not cutting my papers properly – I agree with him – I say I like to hear him swear [.] He says he was drunk [.] I congratulate him for he looks too unhappy & too responsible [,] contented [.] He ought to make an ass of himself a few times